In Defense Of: Outlandish Rap Lyrics

I have a confession to make. I am a huge rap junkie.  I don’t look it, with my eyeglass chains and my knitting antics, but as a child I wasn’t given access to television or internet, so my only contact with the outside world was through my radio. I loved spitting rhymes while alone in my room, and it’s a habit that has followed me ever since. 8 mile has recently become one of my favorite movies, and that’s really only because I figured out how to put the subtitles up and rap along.  It is awesome.

The more rap you listen to, though, the more you realize that as fantastic as lyrics can be, they can go pretty far in the opposite direction. In my opinion, though, the lyrics that tend toward the bizarre end up being my favorite ones. And in my search for the most outlandish, quotable rap song, I have discovered that the places where rappers get freaky are the spots in which they get descriptive.  In rap, adjectives aren’t just an accepted part of speech- they’re a challenge.  Three examples:

Watch out for my medallion, my diamonds are reckless. Feels like a midget is hanging from my necklace.

I eat filet mignon, and I’m nice and young, best believe I’m number one.

Vomit on his sweater already, mom’s spaghetti.

Maybe there’s some vast and important symbolism behind these words that I’m too shallow to understand, and if that is the case, I deeply apologize to the artist and anyone who I offend through my ignorance.

But they still make me laugh.

I also have to add that the following video is a veritable minefield of ridiculous lyrics (note- it is a cover), but this girl is so awesome that I am in awe every time I watch it.  Also- the two musicians in the video are engaged. Which makes me so happy. I’m so impressed, I could never be this good. Watch and be amazed:

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